Dealing with annoying people

Who screws up your beautiful plans?

Life is beautiful. Everything is happening at the perfect pace. But hopefully, there is one person who tries to screw up all your plans, someone who irritates the sanity out of you.

We all have to deal with people who annoy us. Many of us may have to deal with more than one irritating person at a time. People who don’t understand our views, who question our every action, who put hurdles on our way, infuriate us. Bad relationships at work or at home affect us in ways we cannot fathom. They degrade our peace of mind and try to reduce our worth in our own eyes.

What can we do about it?

We can try to understand. No one is made irritated. A person may become short-tempered due to some circumstances in their life.

The person you think is irritating you may not be doing it on purpose. Maybe they are facing something stressful. Maybe they are disturbed. Try to understand why the person is behaving so. Before you react to them, think about the reason behind their actions. Do not judge them by their behavior towards you at one instance. Who knows, you may find out that they are not as you think of them. Who knows you may even rescue them out of their difficult phase.

Before you treat them in the same rude way, remember, we all get stressed and we act likewise sometimes too. Do not be cruel. You may feel guilty about yourself later. Try to be compassionate at all times, for the sake of your peace of mind

What if they are always annoying?

If you happen to find out that the person you are dealing with is always irritated and it’s not a phase they are in, take that as the war cry. And it’s not the battle you have to fight. This is the cry after which you need to run away from the battleground. You read that right, do not engage in heated discussions with such people.

If you have a point to make, say it. But do not argue. Keep yourself away from negative vibes. Don’t let them know about it, but avoid them.

What to do if you cannot avoid them?

Face them. Try your best to avoid them but if you can’t, gather all your courage. There is negative the energy coming your way and you have to defeat it

How to do that?

Negativity can only be defeated by positivity. Do not show them that you are being affected. Smile at them, as difficult as it may seem. Listen to them, even if you don’t want to understand a word they say. Reply to them politely. Keep smiling always.

When they see you unaffected from the negativity they are giving you, they’ll stop. Your positivity will win. Be consistent. It is very important to understand that our peace of mind is most supreme, more than people who seem to annoy us, it is even more important to remember that it is a person we are dealing with. We cannot change their behavior or their viewpoint. But we can surely control ourselves. More power to you. Hope you remain positive at all times.

October 21, 2019May 10, 2020

3 Ways to Stay Relaxed

Like every other day, I woke up early in the morning. I sat down and completed my 5-minute breath exercises. I had a hectic schedule for the day. After getting out of bed, one thing follows another, the next time I saw the clock, it was well past noon. I sighed. “I need a break,” I said to myself.

Have you ever felt the same? I am sure you have. Each one of us is in the pursuit of matching the speed of the ticking feet of time. But time seems to be ahead. Always. To acquire this imaginary horizon, we often forget that continuously working may harm us.

Working without any break may stress you. Small amounts of stress adding up every day may lead to an unhealthy stressful lifestyle.

The body and the mind need a break. Working continuously exhausts them. It is very important to take small leisurely breaks from work and relax.

Below are some of my ideas of taking a break which you can try

1. Eat your favourite food.

Food is an instant mood changer. Chocolate lovers won’t agree more, isn’t it? Drowsiness will run away from you as you pop in a candy. Try it if you need a mini-break and can’t go anywhere. But if you can get out somewhere, go to your favourite nearby food joint and order your favourite food. Eat slowly and savour and treat your taste buds.

Listen to music. The next fastest mood changer is music. Create a playlist for every mood when you are free. Plugin your earphones and listen to one song or two when you feel like. Play music in your car while going back home. Tune into a music channel while you make or eat dinner instead of listening to worldly issues on the news channel.

2. Escape into nature.

The winds, the sunsets and the rains have enormous relaxing powers .go to the nearby window and watch the view. Allow the slow winds to ease your nerves. If it’s raining, show your hands and face. Lets droplets cool you down. Watch the sunset if it’s the evening time. Watch it the whole. Try to make your mind blank and enjoy the void.

If you are at home, there are even better ways of relaxing

You could cook something easy and yummy. Make a cool refreshing drink and have it.

You could take your favourite book off the shelf and read a few pages, or read your favourite poem.

If it’s a weekend and chores for the day are complete. If You want to relax before you go out in the evening. Here are some ideas

Watch an old movie. A three-hour nostalgic journey of feelings and some popcorn. Sounds amazing, right?

3. Get artsy

Are you the type who was too good at painting at some time, but lost habit because of age and duties? You still have the paintbrushes and colours. Why wait then? Grab them and fill the canvas again with colours like you used to. Nothing can refresh you more than your older version.

Go for it. Try one or all of my ideas and share them with your friends, and tell them to share with their friends, coz we all need a break from time to time, don’t we?

October 11, 2019May 9, 2020

A bad day or depression?

Does having a bad day means you are depressed?

Do not worry, most probably you are not.

When should you start worrying about your mental health?
How will you identify if your mental condition is normal or concerning?
Is it okay to have a bad week?
How are bad days differentiated from depression?

What is a bad day?

On some days you wake up with a slight headache. A morning stretching and yoga session doesn’t help much. You know your workload for the day will not end in that day, you don’t feel like doing anything. Nothing excites or amazes you. With a straight face, you complete every activity sluggishly.

Trust me, it is completely fine to have such a day. You will not have the same energy every day. It is perfectly normal to have a lazy day or a bad day. It is alright to have emotional stress or anxiety. Experiencing such days is important for your growth as a person.

What if I have a bad week?

The other day when I said my friend “having a bad day is normal“, she asked “nothing is working out for me for a week. “Seven days of complete hopelessness is bad. Seven more days are worse.

Clinically, one is in depression if they have had two weeks or more of complete hopelessness or mental agony.

What are the other signs of depression?

Depression can show different signs in different people. The main symptom is your thoughts. Clinical depression patients feel hopelessness, anxiety, and stress over trivial issues. In worse cases, suicidal thoughts follow next. The next important sign is a change in the sleep cycle. You may either feel too sleepy or completely insomniac. Another indication is variation in weight. Gain or loss of 5 percent or more weight within a month is considered a symptom of depression. A combination of these signs means you need to consult a doctor.

Why should one consult a doctor?

Most of us think that mental illness doesn’t need a doctor’s consultation. Even if it worries us, we don’t share it with anyone.

A step in the wrong direction at this cross point can lead to a destructive destination. It is important to take the right step. Anyone can have depression. Sometimes, people with a seemingly perfect life, also get trapped in this disorder. A specialist’s guidance can be a map of this maze.

Even if you are not suffering from depression and you know it, but you feel worried, go for a consultation, or talk about it. It will relieve you. When you need help, don’t shy away, ask for it.

October 3, 2019May 9, 2020

In search of peace

Often, in life, We try to reach a point where we don’t have to worry about anything, We set our goals accordingly, We work hard, overtime in the office, to earn the amount that we need for a vacation, We persuade our friends so that we fit into their plans for the weekend.

Why do we do so?

The answer to these queries is simple – to attain peace.

Going on that vacation will give you peace. You will be out of the regular routine life, away from the everyday chaos.

Hanging out with your friends, for those precious some hours, will take you away from the tensions that surround you always. You will be out of the clutches of your troublesome thoughts.

Have you ever wondered why you need to attain a specified condition, to attain peace? How would it be, if peace could come to you, unconditionally? Without a price tag, without any persuasion.

Life would become amazing, right? Well here’s how:

It’s just a matter of the mind. Peace is not a place. It is not a person either. It’s a feeling, like any other, like happiness and sorrow. This lies deep within you, undiscovered. So, like any other feeling, it will come to you when you need it. You don’t need to travel miles to find it, while it is right under your nose.

So the next time you feel like you need a break, you need not run away from your office desk or sofa room. You can stay right there and get what you want to be delivered at your steps. Remember, it’s all in the mind. So close your eyes, and say yourself “I am at peace. This also will pass away.” Relax your mind and discover how peace slowly creeps in. And when you are done with your quota, dive into your tasks with the energy peace leaves you with.

September 26, 2019May 9, 2020

How to Reduce Stress and Tension?

Tension:

Tension is known as mental or emotional strain.

Who experiences tension?

Everybody experiences tension. Tension and anxiety are as natural as thirst. It is not a cause for concern to face stress; in fact, a little stress is very important for growth. Stress improves performance.

However, it is alarming when tension strikes too often. Minor problems give a huge headache. Small pleasures don’t make you happy anymore. Nothing seems to be in control. Situations slip out of the hands like dry sand from the gaps of the fingers. Fear of misunderstanding doesn’t allow you to confide in a friend. The frequent occurrence of these signs means you need to act upon the circumstance before it’s too late.

How to get relieved from Tension?

Talk it out loud:

When something bothers you, don’t bottle it up. Take your time to find the right words and then confide your worry to a person who will understand. Talk to your parents, or call your school friend even if you haven’t been in contact for a long time. Talking it out will help you relieve your nerve. You will be able to see your problem in a clearer way. With a little assistance from your confidant, you can find a solution. Talking it out is the easiest and fastest way of solving any issue.

Give in:

It is very important to analyze what is bothering you actually. There are times when we feel frustrated about everything, small or big, while the root cause is something completely else. A misunderstanding with your spouse in the morning can lead to a quarrel with your colleague over an entirely different issue at the office. When you face such frustration, give yourself a moment. Don’t act in anger. Sit down and find the real cause. Ask yourself if it really is worth your reaction. Most probably you will find yourself answering “I shouldn’t be so angry over this trivial issue “.Anger in tension often leads to resentment. So, always calm yourself down before you react.

Go easy:

In today’s age, time seems to travel at a higher speed than light. All of us are striving to keep pace with it. When a small task is not done in time, you feel instant guilt building up at the back of your mind. How will I complete this? If I can’t do this, what will happen to my other bigger plans? Will I ever live up to the expectations that people have on me? And the chain of thoughtful questions goes on. Before you impose any harsh disciplinary routine over yourself, shun the superman urge. Hard work and hustle are important but not at the cost of mental tension. Plan your actions according to your capabilities.

The quest for peace of mind is universal. We have to work to achieve it. Meanwhile, trust the process of the universe. Everything has the right time. By worrying over an issue, we cannot reach somewhere before or after the right time. Being patient is important

July 28, 2019May 9, 2020

Positive Ways to Start the Day

“Morning shows the day” they say. They say it right. But do you feel like every day is just the same? Are your mornings dull and boring? And don’t you spend the whole day with the same kind of lazy lousy feeling? Well maybe you aren’t waking up the right way

Here are the 5 best ways to begin your day.

1. WAKE UP WITH POSITIVE THOUGHTS

Life is so full of difficulties, isn’t it? You have deadlines to meet, bills to pay, house chores to complete and to top it all, you have had a row with your partner. As you open your eyes, these thoughts creep into your mind. Nightmares seem to have escaped from imagination to reality. You feel a slight headache. You feel like going back to sleep again. Don’t do it though.

Drive these thoughts a little away. Tell them to queue up and come later in the day. Tell yourself – this is the beginning of another day, a brand new chance to fix things and explore your life. This little bout of positive thoughts is a proven way of turning your day much better.

2.TALK TO YOURSELF

Wondering how you are going to get the ‘burst’ of positive energy in the morning. What you are looking for is in you. Talk to yourself. As Vivekananda said, when you don’t talk to yourself, you miss a conversation with the most amazing person. You are amazing. No one is going to know you better than yourself.

So when you wake up next morning, wish yourself a chirpy good morning. Tell yourself how amazing you are, how everything is going to turn up just fine, and in time. Tell yourself “we can do it! let’s dive into the day!” and see how you roll.

3. KEEP THE SMARTPHONE ASIDE

Most of us these days, start our day on screen. Oh! how irresistible smartphones are. We begin with putting the alarm off but then see the notifications and start scrolling through them. somehow the first 30 minutes of the day get consumed in thinking about worldly affairs. This small habit has made us so lost in the outer world, that we fail to connect with ourselves, with our own soul. It is undoubtedly true that we need smartphones in this smart age. But not at the cost of losing our peace of mind.

So when you put your alarm off tomorrow morning, do not look at the notifications bar. Your emails and texts can wait. Keep your phone aside till you finish your breakfast.

4.FAITH IS THE ANSWER

Have faith in the divine and practice it. Follow your duties towards your belief. A healthy life is only possible when you are spiritually satisfied.

Belief is a state of mind. The thoughts in your mind create the results. All your experiences, all your actions and all the events and circumstances of your life are but the reflections and reactions of your own thought. So most importantly, have faith in yourself.

5. BREATHE

Sit down. Straighten your back. Close your eyes. Breathe. Let the fresh morning air fill your lungs. Let the positivity it brings with itself reach your mind. Try to make your mind oblivious to anything going around you or inside you. Create a void in your mind. Now, breathe deeper. Continue deep breathing for at least 5 and at best 15 minutes every morning. On some days, do some simple stretching exercises. You may go to the gym or work out at some other time of the day, but this little session is equally important

Now that you have read the 5 mantras to begin a day, I am sure you are excited about tomorrow morning. Follow each mantra step by step. Wake up, cheer yourself. Talk to yourself. Do your exercise. Remember, every day is an opportunity. Every day is important. So, beginning every day in the right way is very important.

July 23, 2019May 9, 2020

Error 404 – Sleep not found

It is 11 in the morning. I wander around the dining hall thinking of nothing specific when I stumble upon the broom. I put the broom in its place and stand there for an extra second. Mum comes out of the kitchen, “you know what, you’re still awake, better attend the bed. Have you ever done something better than sleeping?” That’s when it strikes me, “why can we sleep at all?”. So I do what I do best, I sit down by my desktop and search.
We spend one-third of our lives sleeping.

Scientists still don’t know what exactly sleep is, they only describe the method. They call it tired nature’s sweet energy restorer. Yes! Time spent sleeping is not time wasted. It is used effectively in rejuvenating the body.
What happens when we sleep? To start with the brain wave ripples, broaden, they relax. The muscles relax as a consequence. The temperature of the body, vital sign, and heartbeat decrease. The senses fade. Consciousness is lost.

Why do we sleep at night? Behavioural scientists and psychologists have found out that our ancestors hunted in the light of the day. they used night time to sleep and restore their energy for the next day’s work and play. We evolved this practice as our biological time i.e. the day and night cycle. As a result, now our brain has adapted to this practice as a function. No matter what work we do, we will feel drowsy at night
Why then do we go against this innate characteristic of the body? It is a prevalent trend in our city these days. We move around, hanging out with friends, eating street food, attending lavish weddings till the wee hours of the morning.

Hyderabad has been the land of royal nizams and nawabs, charming traditions, language, attire, and cuisine. But extravagant weddings organized for social recognition that goes long into the night have paved the way to a lamenting problem.

It is our responsibility to feed our body with the right food at the right time and give it enough rest. We assume that the hours at night after office or after the kids are off to sleep is the only time we can spend with ourselves doing ‘our thing’. This belief is utterly wrong.
We have forgotten the golden hours of the morning. The chirping of birds, the rising sun, the cool air are the conduits of positive energy that we require daily. We can spend at least an hour with ourselves doing something that gives inner peace like reading a book or writing or singing or cooking, blocking all the news and notifications of the outer world in the morning. This will definitely increase our productivity for the day because the mind would have had its rest and rejuvenation.

I am sure within every week approximately this easy technique of paying your ‘me time’ within the morning will encourage you to sleep at the proper time, complete your sleep cycle and wake up early in the morning.